Big Island, Big Fun, part I: adjusting my contrast

The day before I left for Hawai'i was Easter. Here was the view from my church's parking lot:

Big, fat flakes. Very pretty, but not very compatible with all the cute little Easter dress shoes.

I got home yesterday. This is what's happening in my driveway RIGHT NOW:

That's right, a plow. And that's all fresh snow, with the pile still growing. Out like a lion indeed.

Now for the good part. Here's me on Easter Monday:

HAHA!! Escape!

I flew Minneapolis to Honolulu by way of Portland. As we flew over my beloved Cascades, I experienced a moment when I just wanted to get off in Portland, rent a car, and visit old friends and favorite trails in and around Olympia for the week. I resisted the urge, but all you OlyWA and Centralia folks out there, know that you're missed.

I went to Hawai'i to visit and travel with my wonderful, wanderlustige friend Dawn, who is currently pursuing that elusive beast known as ethnomusicology at UH-Honolulu. Sadly, she came down with a nasty bug right before I arrived, so Sarah, her friend and the third member of our intrepid travel trio, picked me up from the airport. While Dawn recovered in solitude and general discomfort, I had another gracious tour guide. In a grad student department of about 8, wouldn't you know that one of them was a fellow Ole music major? Sarah McClimon (different Sarah) nicely drove me down to nearby Waikiki for a little sightseeing and catching up. This was by far the most touristy spot I visited the entire trip, but also very lovely, and good to see for the sake of comparison with the rest of my week.

It took me a solid day to adjust to vacation mode: no To Do lists, no deadlines, no politics. Just a couple of friends, guide books and a general idea of what we wanted to do. It may have taken an ocean, but it worked: I actually got far enough away from work that I didn't think about it all week, except as a distant sort of thing, out of place and easy to brush aside. Ahh, just what I needed.

That was basically Monday, day 1. With how much we crammed into each of our days, I'm taking this a day at a time. More to follow...

sometimes you wanna go where at least some people know your name

I've been missing my old job a lot lately, for a variety of reasons I won't get into right now. But I moved back for family, and that hasn't changed. There's also something irreplaceable about living in the place you grew up. I'm not saying it's the best or only way to go, certainly. But I was at the chiropractor this week getting all straightened up and aligned, and when I mentioned that I had to wear one of those metal bars across my feet as a baby to correct my goose feet, my chiropractor said, "Oh yeah, I remember that." Old family friend. Nowhere else in the world would I get that response. There's something about people who have known you your entire life; they occupy a unique place in your personal universe. At least, they do in mine. They're not always my closest or best friends, but they know me in ways no one else can, in first-person historical ways. I've discovered that having contact with people like that, inside and outside of my family, is important to me.

what is this, a key party?

Sheesh, I'm home sick for a few days, and the whole place goes wonky. The Powers That Be in my library system decided that managers in the system could do with some cross-training by switching to different libraries for a while. Sounds like a good idea to me; get some fresh ideas and perspectives stirring around. However, They have decided to switch out all three of our senior managers at once. Um, is that normal? I, for one, wouldn't relish the idea of being a new boss in a large building and having nothing but other new bosses to back me up. A few possible explanations occur to me:

1. TPTB didn't notice until the email went out, which was, of course, Too Late To Back Out.
2. TPTB are conducting an experiment in management. The security cameras have been retrained on staff areas instead of the public floor, and the footage will be streamed live as a reality show on Xtreme Managrz, the radical leadership website.
3. TPTB simply don't care what we think.

There are doubtless other options as well, but those three seem like the most likely to me at the mo.

top this, Martha Stewart

As promised, the photo. In case you were wondering how you should set the table at your Beowulf party, here's one idea: a big shiny sword, a cake shaped like Grendel's arm, and lovely fruit and cheese plates.

And because it was tucked behind the photo, here's another piece of history:


I have no idea what's become of either of these college friends. So Ben or Dave, if you're out there, give a shout, wouldja?

can I be a violence prude instead?

I'm currently watching the new Beowulf movie starring pixelated versions of Anthony Hopkins, Robin Wright Penn, Angelina Jolie, etc. There's a large amount of hacking, slashing, rending of limbs, drinking of blood, and other graphic violence befitting an Old English hero legend. But when our hero strips off his armor and fights Grendel in the nude, there always seems to be a knee, sword, shadow, or dismembered monster finger conveniently blocking the view of his nether regions. Kind of funny, actually.

when full-frontal was unavoidable, they found him a loincloth

Now, call me lacking in proper feminine sensitivity, but are penises really a fate worse than dismemberment to witness?

Don't answer that.

And don't get me started on how much of Angelina Jolie's pixelated bod they didn't hide in shadows, strangely enough. Streaks of gold body paint don't count.

Speaking of dismembered monster fingers, it reminds me of the Grendel's arm cake baked by some college friends for the reception after the premiere of their new composition, Beowulf: The Musical. Once I find a scanner, I'll show you. Some of you remember it fondly, I'm sure.

March LNO

What happens when librarians get together down the pub and consume a few beers? Well, sometimes we do Mad Libs. Sexy Mad Libs. And since we're librarians, we use words like "turgid" and "merkin". Look that one up, if you dare.

fun with cataloging

Like I've probably said before, catalogers are a strange breed. It takes a certain type of person to savor the challenge of categorizing the whole of human knowledge, one Library of Congress Subject Heading at a time. I think you need to be either completely humorless, or find a wry, twisted humor in nearly everything. Mostly I'm guessing it's the latter.

My latest discovery involves the graphic novel series Noble Causes, which features a very dysfunctional family of superheroes. First I was entertained to see that one of its headings is
Problem families -- Comic books, strips, etc. Often times catalogers will get specific to the point that the category is no longer helpful- after all, if every book has its own unique subject heading, what's the point? For example, Germany -- History -- Night of the Long Knives, 1934 -- Drama. I have no idea what the Night of the Long Knives was, but it doesn't surprise me that we only have one drama about it. But I digress. Just as I was about to scoff and add Noble Causes' Problem families -- Comic books, strips, etc. to the useless list, I noticed that my library actually has 17 items in that category. Huh. I guess lots of comic book authors/artists have been putting the 'fun' back in 'dysfunction' lately.

Then of course, there are categories in which less is more: Deviant behavior -- Handbooks, manuals, etc.

Just one entry there. And that's probably okay.

push the button, Frank*

Today I received the fourth in a series of emails at work regarding duress alarm training. For the sake of elucidation, I have photographed the underside of my reference desk:

That whitish thing is the duress alarm. It is a recessed switch to help us avoid accidentally triggering it while trying to adjust the motorized desk (which happens anyway, but maybe not as often as it could). In the event of major unpleasantness, which we experienced last month, you put your finger in the hole and pull toward you, and county security, police, SWAT team, what have you, are notified that the library, and your desk in particular, is experiencing duress. An excellent feature to have in a public building. But honestly- how much training does it take? Mind you, this is not training for what to do in the unlikely event of a [fill in duress-inducing situation here]. This is training for the alarm itself. If I don't see the need for the training, does it mean that I don't need it, or that I don't realize how badly I need it? Would I enjoy the training as ironically good fun, or would I later mourn the loss of 30 precious minutes of my life? I may step up and do it just to find out.


*kudos to you if you got the reference. If not, educate yourself.